If I tell you that you can’t get long hair in 3 days, let alone 3 months or even a year would you still care about your hair?
I see so many people who are fascinated
about growing their hair. They watch YouTube, read articles or listen to
others proclaim that they grew their hair long in a short amount of
time. Everyone is jumping on the bandwagon.
Well, sorry to disappoint you but there
is no easy shortcut. If there was, your hair would grow regardless of
how you mismanage it, even with the “magical growth serum”; but that is
not the case.
The truth is, your hair growth takes
time and patience. Patience is virtue. You have to take the time to know
your hair; to understand what it likes and dislikes. But most of all
you have to step away from what does not work; if you are relaxed and
you do not see results try being natural. If you are natural and don’t
see results try being relaxed. If you wear a weave the entire time, try
stopping that and pay attention to any changes.
Another issue is that people jump from
bandwagon to bandwagon not giving their experiment enough time – hence
the need for patience – to see if they are getting results. We are
obsessed with instant gratification that we take a scissors to the hair
every 4 to 6 weeks under the false guidance of so call experts. We also
think we must shampoo every day, or relax every so often.
Those who truly know hair know that none of the above is accurate for all hair types.
I used to feed into the false notion
that I couldn’t grow my hair; I used to envy my younger sister who was
blessed with the “Rudy Huxtable” type of hair- thick and long. While we
were young we did not have relaxers, but things changed while we were in
Junior High. I loved the styles that relaxers provided, and boy did I
take advantage of them all, even the shaved back.
One thing that was consistent was that
my hair grew back after years, but seemed to stop at a certain length
and it was so thin. I went years with relaxers trying to obtain those
wonderful long locks, but all the relaxer ever paid me back was thinner
hair and fading edges.
After much research I went from relaxer
to transitioning for more than a year to a semi big chop, and the latest
big chop after 3 1/2 years as a natural. It has been almost two years
now and here are some of the things that I have learned along the way.
Don’t Buy Into the Hype
Not all products are special; most are made with the same ingredients… just a different way of marketing them.
Know your Hair
What works for some might not work for all. Eggs are a big craze now for
conditioning the hair. I eat eggs, but have always had a disaster when
attempting to use it on my hair. In fact, I attribute it as the reason
why I had to do my last big chop. I developed a scalp infection which
caused me to itch like crazy.
Maybe it wasn’t eggs, but picking out
remnants of scrambled eggs in your hair is not cute. There are better
ways to condition your hair effectively.
Keep Your Money
Going natural or relaxing should not be expensive. Black hair care is a
money making machine, and many people are taking advantage of this. They
will claim their product is the best and jack up the price because they
know we are chasing length, manageability or thickness.
As a natural I once heard that going
natural was expensive. I was so upset with that comment. Starting
anything is only expensive to the newbie on the block because they
believe the hype and don’t know the ways of the land yet. There are hair
products out there that have to charge more because of distribution,
marketing and production since they are made by smaller companies
fighting for recognition. However, once you know your hair you will come
to the realization that the products you need are simple and cost
effective.
Keep it Simple
Yes, most people with long hair will tell you that they do not have time
to do all this 24- hour hair regimen that most people talk about. It is
bad enough that we go into the salon and spend half of the day; but why
should you continue to do the same out of the salon? Of course some
take the time to give their hair extra TLC, but it should not be an
everyday event. Take the time for your hair to miss you and miss being
fussed over.
The conditioner IS Your Best Friend
It doesn’t have to be fancy; as long as it is a conditioner that works for you, it is good.
I once got into conditioners when I
asked a white guy in my college chemistry class what made his blond hair
so long. The boy said lots of conditioners. This was odd to me back
then (80s and 90s) because as black people we didn’t use conditioners.
You were fancy if you did. Shampoo was the only hair product next to the
black hair care products. But the idea didn’t sink in till I used my
college roommate’s conditioner and fell in love with it. Shhh…don’t tell
her that!
Our Hair Does Grow
It might not be at the astronomical rate that you desire but it does
grow. Try taking pictures at intervals and by the end of the year check
the progress. If you don’t see a change, think of what you might have
done wrong. It could be that you trimmed more often than you should; and
breakage or split ends could be another culprit.
Minimum Heat is Required
If you know anything about black hair care you know that we are raised
to believe that heat (extreme at that), is our hair’s best friend. This
is false. Heat causes damage to the follicles, which can lead to
breakage or split ends.
Be Wary of Myths & Hair Legends
There are so many myths about our hair that it is taking us a long time
to dispel them. Majority of us used to believe that our hair can’t grow –
that if you have long beautiful hair it must be genetic… or that we all
have the same hair type. It took some time, but those myths as well as
others are going out the door and never coming back.
Patience calls for you to give your new
texture almost the time you provided the previous texture, as well as
the same understanding. There is nothing more annoying than a person who
was natural for a hot second after being a relaxer for more than a
decade only to rant about being natural. You didn’t exercise patience to
see if being natural works out or not. Knowledge is important, and so
is patience.
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